Saturday, April 01, 2006

Thank God It's April

Finally, a month I can be happy about! March was just nutty and stressful. I'm not sure if April will be less crazy or stressful, but for some reason April brings me a sense of hope, enthusiasm and energy. I feel like even if bad things happen, they won't get me as down in April as they would in other months. April is a month of blessings and new beginnings. April is a HAPPY month! It always has been for me, so I can act accordingly. :)

Today I will experience the joy of rummage sales. I know it's amazing and fun to find treasures in rummage sales or thrift stores for cents or dollars apiece. However, even with that joy and fun, I am really looking forward to a day when I have a larger disposable income than $100 per month, so I can actually go clothes shopping at real stores every now and then. I'm not incredibly materialistic, but some days it would be nice to go to a real store and get my own new clothes that have never been used by anyone else. This is one way in which I truly live in solidarity with the poor, because they RELY on things like rummage sales and thrift stores and hand-outs for their entire wardrobes! I can definitely understand how they get sick and tired of it and of living in that cycle. I don't mean to sound ungrateful or selfish or whatever, but if I am, one day, able to live in a way that allows me to purchase new clothes or other things, I will not feel guilty doing that. At the same time, I know that this year of simple living and living in solidarity with the poor WILL help me not to purchase the EXTRA nonsense that people so often do when they don't really need it. I think I will be much more aware of my purchases -- "Do I actually need this?" " Will I actually use this?" "If in a year I'm not using it, will I throw or give it away?" I know this year of simplicity will affect my life in that way, though not in the way of NOT purchasing anything new.

Lent has been a journey. I fell off the wagon a bit this past week and am trying my darnedest to get back on. The only promise I have kept 100% is the one dedicated to my mom, who celebrated 15 years of sobriety on St. Patrick's Day. I don't like feeling out of control and I need to get back to that sense of power over my eating habits. Every now and then it becomes a struggle and I really can't seem to stop eating stuff I shouldn't or eating more than I should. But I have willpower and that allows me to get back to the true path. God helps those who help themselves, but he also catches us if we fall, picks us up when we fall down, and supports us in everything we do. His immense love for us and his undying mercy and forgiveness are what keep us hopeful, alive, and successful. If we let his light work through our lives. These are the things I am focusing on this Lent and trying to make a greater part of my life.

Yesterday was the First Communion retreat with my second graders. We spent time learning about the Eucharist, the Mass, and the various stories involving the Body & Blood of Jesus Christ. They retained a lot of it and seemed to really enjoy themselves. We wrote love letters to Jesus and they were so serious while they were writing and the few I glanced at were so precious. They love Jesus, and at that age I am glad they do and I pray that they can love him for the rest of their lives. I still remember my second grade teacher telling us that when we walk down the aisle towards Holy Communion, we can say with each step "I love you Jesus" or "I know you love me Jesus." I still to this day remember that and sometimes do that, and that was 15 years ago that I made my First Communion. Some things will always stick with us. I wonder what will stick with these second graders 15 years down the line when they are reflecting back on their childhood.

Next weekend my mom and John will be here. I am extremely excited to see them, especially my mom. I am so grateful and blessed to have such a wonderful relationship with her. I love her soooo much. I can't wait to share my St. Louis experience with them. Before they get here though, I have two phone interviews (Groves Academy - Minnesota, and San Miguel Schools - Chicago). I will also be talking with a Marquette alumnus who works at the Chicago Symphony Orchestra to pick his brain about how to start a career in the Chicago arts scene. It will be a busy but wonderful week -- please keep me in your prayers!

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